•I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow, isn’t looking good either.•I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.•Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?•I’d explain it to you, but your brain would explode.•Someday we’ll look back on …
Month: October 2020
This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab . Dear Mr Bill Gates , We have bought a computer for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to your notice. 1. After connecting to internet we planned to open e-mail account and whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the …
After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increment, no commendation. So he decided to walk up to his HR Manager. His manager looked at him, smiled and asked him to sit down saying: “My friend you have not worked here for even a …
* Everything you eat is savoured with garlic, onions and chillies. * You try and re-use gift wrappers, gift boxes, and of course aluminium foil. * You are standing next to the two largest size suitcases at the airport. * You arrive one or two hours late to a party, and think it’s normal. * …
Woman – A Chamical Analysis Element Name: WomanPeriodic Chart Symbol: WoDiscoverer: AdamAtomic Mass: Generally accepted as 110 lbs., but known to vary from 110 to550 lbs.Occurence: Copious quantities in all urban areas. PHYSICAL PROPERTIES 1.Surface usually covered with a painted film.2.Boils with no provocation.3.Freezes up solid unexpectedly.4.Melts if given special treatment.5.Bitter if incorrectly used or …
1.Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other. 2. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test. 3.Marriage : It’s an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains …
It can happen only in Indian Movies Baghban: Amitabh Bachchan and Hema Malini are separated right after Holi remember Amitabh singing Holi khele Raghubeera?). They are said to be separated for six months, ie from March to September. Within that six-month period, they celebrate Valentine’s Day, which falls on February 14, and karva chauth, which …
A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the pants. Don’t be irreplaceable, if you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted. The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get. You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry …
If you try to leave the proper driving distance between you and the car in front of you, someone will always move in. The guy that has a bumper sticker that says “If you can read this, You’re too close” always tailgates. Trucks that overturn on the highway are alway filled with something sticky. There’s …
Vending machines only contain edible material when you are not hungry. The person in front of you will always get the last one. If the vending machine actually has what you want, it will cost more than the amount of change that you have. Anything you purchase will get stuck and hang on the edge …